by Solange Lopes | Dec 3, 2017 | Find Your Purpose
As a bookworm, there are many books I love to read and re-read, over and over again. There are actually too many for me to list. However, at the end of every year, I have as a tradition to pick the books I would like to read again in the new year, whether as related to self-development, business or career advice.
This year, there are seven books on my list of classics that have changed my perception of success and life in general. These are the books I keep on my bookshelf with the tag “Success” on them.
Here’s the list below:
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This is my all-time favorite, not just because my faith is based on it, but because it teaches so many true life and success principles. From the basics of integrity as people to the foundation of power and prosperity in life, the Bible is my go-to for inspiration and counsel in every area of my life.
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The first time I read this book, the first question that came to mind was: “Why didn’t I read this before?” This classic book published in 1937 is the compilation of 25 years of research into the most brilliant, wealthiest and most powerful 20th century men’s mindset, from Andrew Carnegie, Henry Ford, Thomas Edison and many more. If creating wealth and prosperity is among your goals, this is a must-read.
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False fears and beliefs are the biggest barriers to success. In The Big Leap, author Gay Hendricks shows us to eliminate these barriers to success by identifying and eliminating these false beliefs. If you need to overcome any mindset blocks preventing you from getting to the success you’ve always dreamt of, this book is for you!
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This is a bold and cunning book that will make you look at power in a totally different way! If you’re interested in gaining, observing or defending against power in your own life, career and/or business, or simply understand the rules of the game, this is a must-add to your bookshelf. From the need to be prudent to the value of confidence, it will teach you recognize and apply power for ultimate success.
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Think getting rich is a mystery, or reserved to a lucky few? Think again. In this historic book published in 1910, author Wallace Wattles reveals the New Thought principles which bring the power of getting wealthy down to a science. Rhonda Byrne, the “Secret” creator, credits it for inspiring her.
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This 20-year old book is still very much relevant, and not just in the personal finance arena. In this now cult book, Robert Kiyosaki explores the myth that you need to earn a high income to be rich, and instead teaches us what we (and our kids) need to know about creating real wealth. A must-read!
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This fierce call to claim your personal power will have you motivated for months on end! Written by world-renowned high-performance trainer Brendon Burchard, it reveals that our main goal is to pursue Personal Freedom. In a defying work of art, Burchard pushes us to overcome our fears and self-doubt and take back our power.
What other books would you add to this list?
To Your Success,
The Corporate Sister.
by Solange Lopes | Dec 3, 2017 | Find Your Purpose
This morning, my son and daughter were both painting their Santa figures. A peaceful Santa painting workshop quickly turned into a comparison war, as they both started comparing their mini works of art. Pretty soon, we had to break a kiddie war on who the next Picasso would be.
As I watched them, I realized how so many of us grow up to compare our looks, intellect, careers, businesses, down to our hair and the way our homes are decorated. From the times we’re taught by society as kids to be good or bad, taller or shorter, lighter or darker-skinned, richer or less rich, we start internalizing these messages. In turn, it becomes harder and harder as time passes by to stop this act of violence against ourselves.
Comparing ourselves to others is effectively denying our uniqueness, our God-Given talents, gifts and abilities. It’s doubting that we are fearfully and wonderfully made, and that no two of us is alike. Instead, it’s allowing the pressures of society, as well as our own self-imposed pressures, to not leverage what we have in front of us. If there ever were a distraction to success, comparison is definitely it.
How do we stop comparing ourselves to others when most of us are raised and socialized to do so? How do we manage, especially as working women, to withstand the demands of modern society and the influence of social media to run our own races? And how do we stay on track and on our own lane despite it all?
I’ve asked myself these questions one too many times. Growing up in a single parent family in Senegal, West Africa, being original was not exactly the priority. At the time, it was about surviving first, then making it second. Sometimes, when you’re coming up against the curve, your main parameters can come from others around you. And when you’re different, what seems to be the norm can also appear like your only parameter.
One good thing, actually probably the only good thing about comparing yourself to others, is that it stirs up a pain and uncomfortable feeling that signals the danger of it. Comparing ourselves to others is being violent to ourselves, and the frustration that comes from it clearly shows it.
Here are a few ways that I’ve learnt to stop the comparison train in my own life, and regained the peace and clarity necessary to pursue my own race:
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Learn to celebrate others (without getting mad at yourself)
One of the biggest reasons why we doubt ourselves is that we fail to celebrate others. The more we celebrate others, the more we learn to genuinely be happy for others. Whenever we can muster the strength to clap for others, we learnt to appreciate everyone else’s individual journey and story without comparing it to ours.
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Realize you don’t know what’s behind everyone’s journey
Very often, we envy others without realizing what hides behind their own journey. You’ve heard it before: “The average success story takes 10 years”. What this also means is that we don’t often see the trials, obstacles and failures on their path. We don’t see the sad moments, the times of discouragement, and the loneliness that has plagued many a successful person. Before you’re tempted to compare yourself to someone else, consider that they may have to pay a price that you may not want to pay.
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Trust your own journey
Every path is unique, so is every individual. What you can do is different from what anybody else can do. Your contribution to this world is uniquely tailored to your personality, gifts and talents. Comparing yourself to someone else implies that you don’t trust or honor your own path and uniqueness. The last thing you want is someone else’s journey.
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Practice gratitude
Gratitude is a powerful towards honoring yourself and your own journey. The more grateful you are, the more you tend to celebrate your own blessings and accomplishments, and the more you tend to enjoy others’ as well.
Being grateful for everything in your life, no matter how seemingly insignificant, is like saying: “I am enough, I am right where I should be when I should be there!”
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Celebrate yourself (even if no one is celebrating you)
Celebrating others is not enough. You must also learn to clap for yourself, without waiting on the approval of others. Celebrate yourself, take yourself out to dinner, treat yourself. Learn to periodically stop and appreciate how far you’ve come, in preparation for how far you’re going.
How have you stopped comparing yourself to others?
To Your Success,
The Corporate Sis.
by Solange Lopes | Dec 1, 2017 | Career
Weekly News Roundup
Welcome to our weekly career, entrepreneurship, lifestyle and fashion news roundup! Think of it as your online watercooler/work gossip station/coffee break spot for now…Want to add anything to our list? Email us at corporate@thecorporatesister.com!
- In royally good news this week, the Wall Street Journal reports that Prince Harry is engaged to Suits’ actress Meghan Markle, and we couldn’tbemore excited;
- The Glassdoor Blog lists 25 awesome companies hiring like crazy in December;
- Forbes Woman gives us a few pointers as to how turn Linked In connections into mentorship opportunities;
- Worried about spending the holidays with family? Ellevate Network advises how to survive the holidays and keep sane;
- Don’t have a college degree? Business Insider lists the best states to work;
- Slacking off at the end of the year? The Daily Muse actually suggests 12 ways that may be more productive than you think;
- Making Sense of Cents shares 8 ways to change your holiday spending and make this year more meaningful than ever;
- Ellevate Network shares the essentials to prepare for a job interview;
- Black Enterprise describes how Impostor Syndrome may be ruining your career;
- The Corporate Sister explains what it means to network like a girl;
- Into The Gloss shares the holiday beauty survival guide.
by Solange Lopes | Dec 1, 2017 | Career
Our guest contributor Dorcia Carrillo shares 3 must-do’s you should have when entering a new contract.
If you are reading this, you have likely entered into at least one legally enforceable agreement. You have probably signed a car rental agreement or clicked a button to accept the terms of service for a particular website. Car rental agreements and terms of service are adhesion contracts. That means they are boilerplate forms companies make their customers sign. Consumers largely cannot negotiate an adhesion contract; they either take it or leave it. People usually do not read them but I encourage you to at least review the contract to understand your rights and responsibilities. For example, a lot of social media users would be surprised at what social media platforms can do with user data, even though those terms are spelled out in the terms of service. Take a look at Facebook’s Sharing Your Content and Information provision if you are interested.
Turning from consumer to commercial matters, I strongly encourage businesspeople to pay close attention to the contracts they draft and/or sign. Compared to consumers, businesspeople typically do have leverage to negotiate favorable terms but also do not have consumer protections against seemingly unfair terms. I am going to lay out a few tips on drafting, negotiating, and managing business contracts. I always recommend working with an attorney who can provide specific advice relevant to your particular business needs.
Do: Proceed with Caution When Using Templates or Online Resources
The prevalence of online resources may make drafting a contract seem easy because you can answer a few questions and minutes later have a contract. The problem with those resources is that they react to what you request rather than guide you to what you need. You may think you need a non-disclosure agreement when you actually need a non-compete. Using the wrong template will obviously produce the wrong result.
By relying on a template instead of individualized legal counsel, you risk running into a serious issue. For example, I reviewed an employment agreement for a friend who wanted to hire unpaid interns. I identified some provisions that should have been in the agreement, but more importantly, I informed my friend of the regulatory requirements for hiring unpaid interns. When I asked if her company had the necessary compliance infrastructure, her response was no. The online resource she used produced an agreement without accounting for regulatory requirements. Accordingly, I recommend that businesspeople invest in legal counsel to help with analyzing, strategizing, and drafting agreements.
Do: Leverage Your Competitive Advantage in Negotiations
As I mentioned, in commercial transactions, businesses have some leverage to negotiate. Use your business’s competitive advantage to negotiate pricing, warranty, licensing, and other substantive terms. I have worked with small companies that are unique in the marketplace and therefore have power to successfully negotiate with larger corporations. Conversely, if you operate a business in a competitive market, be prepared to be more flexible.
You may not gain business because of your paperwork but you could absolutely lose business if your papers are too long or too burdensome. More clearly, if the industry standard for your business is a one-page plain English agreement, do not use a five-page contract laden with “whereas,” “notwithstanding,” and other legalese. I recently drafted a succinct single-page service agreement for a wedding vendor. The agreement adequately protects the vendor’s interest and is also customer friendly. The point is that your business’s market share and industry standards should be considered when drafting and negotiating contracts.
Do: Have a Contract Management Process
Once your attorney has drafted and negotiated a contract, the parties will sign it and live happily ever after. Except drafting and negotiating are the beginning and not the end because you still have to manage the contract. As with anything, mismanagement can lead to problems. I worked with a business client who unknowingly entered into an evergreen agreement and wanted out before the term ended. An evergreen agreement is a contract that automatically renews after the initial term. When you are busy running a business, you may forget to manage contract expiration dates and end up continuing a contractual relationship that is no longer beneficial. For this reason, it is important to take note of the term and termination clause(s) and put a process in place to alert you when action is required. The process can be as simple as using Outlook reminders or as involved as utilizing a contract management software. The volume and complexity of your business agreements will determine what is most suitable. The key is to be sure to track and monitor contract provisions such as termination dates, payment and delivery schedules, and reporting requirements.
I know businesspeople put a lot of effort into fostering business relationships, which is why I recommend they put the same effort into drafting, negotiating, and managing the agreements that govern those relationships. Do your business a favor and make sure its contracts are strategically drafted and negotiated and effectively managed.
Dorcia Carrillo manages a business and corporate law firm, the Law Office of Dorcia Carrillo PLLC, where she guides clients, including entrepreneurs and executives, through the intersection where business deals meet legal documentation. Dorcia likes helping growing businesses with practical legal advice and workable solutions. She is an avid magazine reader and ardent supporter of the Alzheimer’s Association.
To Your Success,
The Corporate Sister.
by Solange Lopes | Nov 30, 2017 | Career
Our Woman of Impact feature presents women who are breaking barriers in their careers, businesses and lives. These women are inspiring us to do our best work and live our best lives.
Our Woman of Impact is Dorcia Carrillo. She’s an attorney and entrepreneur who manages a business and corporate law firm, the Law Office of Dorcia Carrillo PLLC, where she guides clients from entrepreneurs to executives through the intersection between business deals and legal documentation. Dorcia likes helping growing businesses with practical legal advice and workable solutions. She is a New York Giants fan and ardent supporter of the Alzheimer’s Association. Dorcia and I virtually met through Twitter, as she kindly offered to contribute with her legal and business expertise to TCS.
Hi Dorcia! Can you tell us a bit about you and what you do?
I’m a lawyer and have been on my own, in my own practice, for just over a year. The one thing I’ve learnt is that you can never start your marketing or self- promotion too early. I was in a company previously, and in the legal field there are conflicts of interest, but still if I had just started really tapping into my network, that would have provided a better foundation for when I started on my own. That’s the one thing I let everyone know, if they’re looking to go on their own, or start their own business, it’s never too early to start marketing yourself and tapping into your network.
What does a typical day look like for you?
I don’t have a normal day because I have such flexibility now, but I do try to maintain some sort of schedule. When I first started, not having any commitments and not having a client base yet, I found myself staying up all night and not being as productive as I wanted to be. Now I don’t have a strict schedule but I do make sure I put something on my calendar, have some kind of networking event or event that forces me to get out of the house. Last night, I was at a business planning and succession meeting at the local library, so I try to have something like that once a week. I do have a bedtime now. Although I feel like I’m most productive at night, and a lot of people feel that way, it’s important to keep a schedule and get a good night’s sleep.
When I decided to leave my job, I decided to get a part-time job in retail, which I had never worked in retail prior to this. I thought I could maintain my wardrobe while at the same time giving me some structure. I know I’m busy for two days, so I have to focus more on the remaining 5 days. It’s actually something I really like, as I style people naturally. Even as my business grows, it gives me time to relax, especially since being a lawyer can be very stressful.
What made you decide to start your own business and get out of corporate?
It was a number of factors. Mainly, I wanted more edification. I worked in Compliance, and everything was about what you can or cannot do. I wanted more creativity in my work. In other legal areas, there is more creativity, but not so much in Compliance. I was getting disheartened with it. I was also in the Defense sector, which didn’t align with my values, and which I didn’t have much interest in. That was coupled with a desire to have more fulfillment, being proud of what I did and who I was working with. Looking for opportunities and not finding them, I decided then I could create it myself.
What’s the best part about what you do?
The best part is when I connect with a client, learning their business about what they do. Instead of working with the same internal customers who do the same thing for the same people all the time, I get to learn a variety of businesses, see how people across a variety of sectors operate and bring my skills and knowledge to help them. I’ve been working with an environmental company recently, and since I’m good with understanding how processes work, I’ve been able to help them and they were really happy about it. That really makes my day.
How do you face the uncertainty of being an entrepreneur?
The uncertainty in my mind is linked to financial security. Am I going to make enough money? In my experience on this Earth, I’ve had more, I’ve had less, and I’m still here. It’s not that big a deal. The second piece of advice is you can never have enough money. You can never save enough. They tell you to save six to 12 months of living expenses. You can plan as much as possible, but for me, I saved six months of expenses. I ended up having steady business for the past 4 months, and I was living as I did before, and then business slowed down. I had to find other ways to save on expenses and generate more income.
There’s also uncertainty in corporations. I was in a company previously, and survived 4 rounds of personnel reduction. So there’s not much of a difference, because you can have a job and get downsized or laid off. You can have your own business, and in that case, even have more control, because you can identify more ways to increase your revenue, expand your product base, expand into new markets. That’s how I deal with the uncertainty by not framing it that way. And also realizing that with a job, there’s uncertainty as well.
What resources do you use in your business and daily life to be as efficient and productive as possible?
That’s’ a great question. One of the reasons why I started this was to create more opportunities for people who look like me. Right now, I’m a one-woman shop. It’s great because there are so many applications, right from my phone, that I use to manage my time-keeping, billing and invoicing. I use the Microsoft Suite for Outlook and anything administrative. There are so many tools that are free or relatively low-cost. I recommend Tiny Invoice, that’s what I use for my billing and I love it.
Other resources that I tap into is the Ellevate Network, that I use for education, listening to some of the webinars, for networking opportunities. I’ve also had that platform for some of my articles, as well as your blog which has also been a platform for my publishing.
What are the main challenges you face on a daily basis?
The main challenges are articulating how I can help people. Lawyers are a dime a dozen, and I’m always refining my elevator speech. I’m more of an introvert, although my mom wouldn’t agree. I’m not an in-your-face kind of person, I’m more into listening and figuring out what your issues are. The challenge is being able to respond efficiently, and letting you know: “Yes I can help you with that!”
There are other things, because I’m on the younger side and I’m a Black woman. Many times, I am the youngest and only woman of color in the room. I don’t’ see those things as challenges any more, as I do want to serve a community that reflects me, and I’m happy when I have a client who might feel uncomfortable with a traditional law firm and I can provide the same or a better service because I know where they come from.
As a Black woman blazing a trail in your business and industry, what can you tell other Black women about taking a leap of faith and follow up on that dream to create something new?
Tap into your network. We have networks, whether it’s Ellevate, or part of a Greek association or even our churches. There may be resistance at first, but that’s ok. They talk about the old boys club, but we can also have the young girls’ network, or any other type of network. We just have to find ways to tap into them early and often. When I started out, the pastor in my church gave a shout out in my church. People have contacted me because of that. Even if I haven’t worked with them, I was able to give them a reference and plant a seed there.
Shameless self-promotion, we really have to get better at that. We can start doing it organically by tapping into the groups we’re already a part of.
What are you reading or what have you read lately?
I was actually trying to get a book club started aimed at books by Black women. I was reading Luvvie Ajayi’s “I’m Judging You”. I also just finished Gabourey Sidibe’s autobiography, “It’s Just my Face”. I also read a book on micro-resolutions, the title escapes me, but it was about making micro-resolutions, which helped me with productivity. After reading the book, I came up with the small tweak that I don’t get on my phone for social media until noon, and not after midnight.
What music are you listening to?
I do love music, and do listen to Hot 97 which is a NY city, mostly because the conversation is interesting but still light-hearted. Or the top 40 of R&B, or Hip-Hop. In general, whatever’s on the radio and is upbeat.
Where can we find you?
You can contact me online at http://www.dorciacarrillo.com. Feel free to email me at attorney@dorciacarillo.com. I also live in the Norwalk, CT area, so if you’re in the area, I’d be happy to take someone out for a cup of tea to discuss anything legally-related.
I also specialize in handling business transactions for startup operations, especially as related to the acquisition and selling of additional business. Anything related to contracts, distribution agreements, etc. I’m also happy to look at anything related to your business and if it’s something I don’t handle, I’m happy to refer you.
Thanks so much, Dorcia for an amazing interview!
To Your Success,
The Corporate Sis.
