by Solange Lopes | Oct 23, 2017 | Career, Find A Job You Love
Being a woman of color in the workplace comes with many challenges. One of these is the almost constant tendency to be uncomfortable at work. When you’re the only woman of color in the room, when others may not give you the credit you deserve or you may be overlooked entirely, it can be easy to shy away from being your best self at work.
Remember the scene in Something New, when Sanaa Lathan, who works as a corporate finance manager at a top Fortune 500 company, gets overlooked by rich, white clients because she happens to be a Black woman? This scene is one that many women of color face, and live, on a daily or at least frequent basis at work. As a result, we may start internalizing this fear of putting ourselves in uncomfortable situations by speaking up or even being noticed in the workplace.
It takes tremendous effort to keep showing up as our best selves in environments in which we may not be valued or overlooked, especially in professional ones. We may want to go above and beyond to prove our worth, or on the very contrary, recede in the confines of our cubicles or offices and remain quiet. Many times, I chose the latter. I know I’m not the only one…
Instead of beating ourselves up, accept the status quo or burn ourselves out to prove our worth, here are a few ways we can beat our fear of being uncomfortable as women of color at work:
-
Acknowledge the fear
The struggle is real, and so is the fear! The first step to challenge your fears is to acknowledge them. You’re not imagining things, neither do you need to beat yourself up for feeling the fear of facing uncomfortable professional situations. Recognize how you’re feeling and make peace with where you’re at professionally, mentally and emotionally at the moment. Instead of putting yourself down for it, accept it and be open to challenge it!
-
Stop taking it personal!
Taking things personal at work doesn’t help solve them, in the very contrary. Your career is more important than personal considerations, so resist the temptation to take uncomfortable settings and situations personal. Instead, take your focus off of the people involved and start asking yourself what YOU can do to go beyond your own fears and turn the pain into lessons.
Every challenge we face is meant to teach us something about ourselves, and help provide us with the inspiration to create solutions. How are your professional challenges motivating you to beat the fear of being uncomfortable? Once you start answering this question, you’ll be on your way to turning your fear into progress.
-
Do one “small” thing every day to challenge it!
The concrete walls we tend to face as women of color at work can make us feel powerless. One of the reasons for this, is that we may try to solve all the issues we’re facing all at once. There are too many existing systemic and organizational challenges for us to be able to address them all.
Rather, it’s a matter of asking ourselves how we can chip at these issues, one day at a time, starting with ourselves. You know what they say about eating an elephant, one bite at a time, right? What is the smallest thing you can do to address your fear? Can you speak up once during the meeting today? Can you volunteer for a challenging opportunity in the next 30 days? Identify the smallest step you can take today, tomorrow and in the future and act on it!
-
Speak up and Tell your truth
It can be hard to face your truth as a woman of color at work, let alone sharing it with others in the workplace. Yet without telling our stories and letting our truths be known, others around us may not be able to understand what we’re going through. In order for better communication to take place around the challenges faced by women of color at work, there must be a conversation taking place.
This is not about making a litany of complaints to whoever wants to hear. Neither is it about confronting every issue at work. What this is about is being willing to clearly articulate, in a constructive yet firm way, our desire to understand and minimize the obstacles in our way.
It’s about saying that you wanted the promotion and do not understand why you didn’t get it. Are you following up with your management to obtain the feedback you need in order to advance? Are you clearly sharing your expectations, even when they’re being overlooked over and over again? Are you asking the difficult questions rather than shrinking back out of fear?
-
Stop hiding!
Is the fear of being uncomfortable as a woman of color at work keeping you hidden in your cubicle or office? Are you avoiding strategic meetings or shrinking in the back of the room for fear of being judged? Are you not making your voice being heard because the cost may outweigh the benefits?
If you’re invisible, silent or both, then your power to effect change for yourself and others is seriously diminished. Overcoming your fear as a woman of color at work also means coming out of hiding. It means making your contributions known, advocating for yourself as you ask others to advocate for you.
-
Keep showing up
Don’t just show up once or twice, keep showing up each and every day! This means sitting at the front of the meeting room at every meeting. It also means asking for opportunities over and over, long after you’ve been told no the first time. The more you keep showing up, the less fear you feel, and the more you can start turning the tables around you.
This is about persistence and continued effort, at all levels of your career. It’s also about making sure you have the right mindset and stamina to keep showing renewed effort and vigor on a daily basis.
-
Encourage another woman of color
Sometimes, the best way to address a fear we have is to help someone who may be experiencing the same fear. Encourage another woman of color who may be going through the same issues silently. This is not about creating a new “complaint department”, but rather using each other as a source of inspiration, strength and motivation.
How do you overcome your fear of being uncomfortable as a woman of color at work?
To Your Success,
The Corporate Sis
by Solange Lopes | Oct 20, 2017 | Career
Steve Madden Lancer Sneakers – Photo credit: nordstrom.com
Are there sneakers you can actually wear to work? Well, it’s now officially acceptable to wear sneakers to work, especially on casual Fridays (but you may want to check with your dress code, just in case). If you’re wondering how to take a break from your high heels without looking unprofessional, while still being able to rock your “sneaks”, there are options!
I like these sneakers that combine both feminine appeal with functional style:
Heart Sneakers – Photo credit: asos.com
These PUMA heart sneakers from ASOS mix sports and fashion in a clean, streamlined design. And the heart design, just too cute! They’re $111 at ASOS.
Ace-studded embellished sneakers – Photo credit: matches fashion.com
These Gucci ace-stud-embellished sneakers from Matches Fashion are perfect for the fashionista in you. I love my pearls and having them on my sneakers just makes me happy ! These are $670 at Matches Fashion.
Steve Madden Lancer Sneakers – Photo credit: nordstrom.com
These Steve Madden Lancer from Nordstrom sneakers are just the perfect mix of athleisure, comfort and style on those casual days at work! The mid-top style is edgy and modern, yet still appropriate for the office. These are $69.95 at Nordstrom.
What pieces of workwear would you like us to feature? Email us at corporate@thecorporatesister.com!
This post contains affiliate links and The Corporate Sister may earn commissions for purchases through links in this post. Thank you!
To Your Success,
The Corporate Sis.
by Solange Lopes | Oct 20, 2017 | Career
Welcome to our weekly career, entrepreneurship, lifestyle and fashion news roundup! Think of it as your online watercooler/work gossip station/coffee break spot for now…Want to add anything to our list? Email us at corporate@thecorporatesister.com!
- This New York Times article recounting actress Lupita Nyong’o’s experience with Harvey Weinstein makes sexual harassment all too real;
- Tired of “manterruptions”? Ellevate Network offers a 6-step process to halt this;
- Want to become braver at work? These 10 tips will help you boost your confidence at work;
- Black Enterprise shares kudos for this Black women beauty company that scored $1 Million in funding;
- The Muse shares these 16 companies that have amazing employee perks;
- Do you work from home? Forbes reveals how you can get more work done;
- This free app will finally help you control you inbox;
- Ellevate Network tips you off on how to work with a PR firm;
- Busty women alert! Corporette lists the best dress shirts for women with large breasts;
- Not sure which college to apply to? Making Sense of Cents helps you determine which college to apply to;
- WhoWhatWear gives us the lowdown on these under-$100 cold-weather essentials;
- We love food, and we love Halloween costumes, so Food52 lists our favorite food-related Halloween costumes.
To Your Success,
The Corporate Sis
by Solange Lopes | Oct 19, 2017 | Career
Workwear: Fringe Sweater – photo credit: www.whitehouseblackmarket.com
Our Workwear feature presents various pieces of work-appropriate attire at different price ranges and sizes.
Who said you can’t combine fringe power with the comfort of a cotton sweater? This double fringe sweater jacket for White House Black Market is elegant, yet edgy enough to take from desk to dinner. I would pair it with a nice pencil skirt or skinny pants for work, or even your favorite jeans on the weekend.
It’s available in Petite and Regular sizes, and is on sale for $77 at White House Black Market.
What pieces of workwear would you like us to feature? Email us at corporate@thecorporatesister.com!
This post contains affiliate links and The Corporate Sister may earn commissions for purchases through links in this post. Thank you!
To Your Success,
The Corporate Sis.
by Solange Lopes | Oct 19, 2017 | Career
What if you could boost your confidence at work to speak up more, take on more challenging projects and generally be braver in your career or business? What if instead of doubting your skills, abilities and natural talents, you could step into your own career and business and stop acting like you don’t already have everything you need? What if you could boost your confidence at work?
As working women, it can be challenging to find our sweet spot when it comes to tapping into our confidence in the workplace. I know it has definitely been for me, and still is in many instances. However, I also strongly believe that confidence is not necessarily one of those things you’re born with. Not only can you acquire it, you can grow it, mold it and boost it to fit who you are and where you’re going in life.
I went from zero confidence in myself, to pushing myself to doing some of the things that I was most afraid of. From appearing on video to sharing public pictures of myself, to going after my wildest dreams, I’m learning to do more brave work. And there are a few tips that have been helping me, and so many other women, rise above our fears and tap into that confidence we have:
-
Stop beating yourself up!
One of the worst ways we can destroy our self-confidence is to talk ourselves negatively. Negative self-talk not only dampens your enthusiasm, but it robs you of any power to control your career, and life in general. Instead, adopting a positive mindset and attitude can help us stop beating ourselves up!
-
Keep learning!
One of the best ways to get more self-assured is to keep on learning! From keeping up with the latest research to taking trainings and signing up for seminars, the more knowledge we have, the more it can boost our confidence.
-
Know (and use) your strengths!
What are you good at? What comes naturally to you? Very often, those are the exact things we neglect in our careers or businesses, and instead focus on doing what everyone else is. Tap into those strengths and natural abilities and combine them with your career or business.
-
Don’t be afraid to ask questions!
A lot of our fear comes from the fact that we may not have all the answers. However, we’re not supposed to. A strong sign of confidence is to have the courage to ask questions. Don’t be afraid to challenge your lack of knowledge in any area, and inquire about what you don’t know.
-
Watch your language!
How do you talk about yourself? What words do you use to describe yourself? Very often, we can talk down to and about ourselves without even realizing it. This may mean limiting the instances when you say things like “I can’t…”, or “How could I…”. Instead, find ways to do more of what you think you cannot do, or learn how you can accomplish these.
-
Celebrate your success!
How often do you recognize your own accomplishments? How many times do you celebrate yourself? This is not just to brag or show off. Recognizing that you are able to accomplish great things is a great way to boost your confidence. On those instances when you lose your confidence, remind yourself of those instances when you achieved so much!
-
Fake it ‘til you make it!
When dealing with a new challenge or task, it’s normal to feel that you don’t have all the skills or talents you need. The same happens when starting a new job, or being exposed to a new area. This is when faking it ‘til you make it comes in handy. Act with confidence, even when you don’t feel like it, and notice the difference in your mindset and performance.
-
Say yes more often
Are you afraid of taking on new challenges at work or in your business? Saying yes more often, and saying yes to the right opportunities, can help you boost your confidence as well. Dare to get outside of your comfort zone, and saying yes to opportunities that would normally scare you.
-
But learn to say no!
In the same token, learn to stand up for yourself and say no to activities and tasks that keep you from being your best self. It can be a challenge to say no to opportunities not aligned with our purpose; however, learning to do so and practicing it, can go a long way towards establishing our confidence.
-
Enjoy the ride!
There’s nothing like laughing at yourself, enjoying your experiences, and being generally light-hearted can help you improve your confidence in ways you’d have never thought possible.
How do you boost your confidence at work?
To Your Success,
The Corporate Sister.
