by Solange Lopes | Oct 18, 2016 | Career
When I read about Tamika Cross, the African-American ob-gyn who says the Delta crew wouldn’t believe she was a doctor during an emergency, an all-too familiar bell rang in my mind. Later in her viral Facebook post, Tamika Cross calls out to her “fellow young, corporate America working women of color”, as she recounts the incident. A few days later, a second Black female doctor came forward with similar allegations against Delta. More fuel to the fire…
Since then, the #whatadoctorlookslike hashtag has taken over social media, as countless women of color are showing support for Tamika Cross by sharing their selfies and stories online.
As a woman of color in Corporate America, this story may also ring a bell (or two) for you. I know it certainly does for me… Like when the bank clerk does a double take when you deposit a large check (it actually happened to this Black woman architect).Or when your name is followed by a professional designation, and you’re asked for your license to prove it, twice, in a row….
Like Cross, many of us are desensitized to these types of situations because we’ve experienced them one time too many. It’s the kind of “implicit bias” that’s sometimes hard to pinpoint, but hurts just as much, if not deeper, than the overt kind. The kind that leaves you perplexed, and wondering how as people, we’ve come to unconsciously and arbitrarily categorize and define certain types of people.
The disturbing reality behind this implicit bias is that many are not even aware they have it. They tend to have pre-conceived ideas about certain groups of people, ideas which may come from their upbringing or what they have been exposed to.
At the end of the day, it may come down to asking ourselves what we believe in, and why we believe what we believe in. To open this Pandora box and start an honest inner conversation to better understand who we are and why we think or do what we do…
The sad reality is that women, especially women of color, have to constantly defend themselves against these stereotypes and implicit biases. Having to prove our worth, competence and qualifications over and over again, whether during an emergency on a plane like Dr. Tamika Cross, in an office, in the street, at the bank or on the sports field.
And it’s exactly why incidents like the one involving Dr. Tamika Cross aboard a Delta flight, which has given rise to a whole awareness movement, are important to help us start the conversation. To help us change the perceptions around not just #whatadoctorlookslike, but what any working woman, regardless of race or cultural affiliation, is capable of achieving….
Have you experienced this implicit bias as a professional woman of color?
The Corporate Sis.
by Solange Lopes | Oct 14, 2016 | Career
This is our weekly career and lifestyle news update, where we round up exciting news of the last week and we let you have it…ahem, news-wise that is…
Think of it as your career gossiping section on steroids…
And while you’re at it, follow us on Facebook, Twitter,IG, and Pinterest!
Here we go…
- Regardless of your political affiliation, if you’re a woman (or a man), you’ll remember Michelle Obama’s speech this week on what it feels like to be a victim of gender inequality and fear. Bustle tells you more about why this speech that will go down in history;
- In honor of Breast Cancer Awareness month this October, All the Pretty Birds has a great list of beauty products and companies donating some of their profits to the fight;
- You know how you’re supposed to ask at least one smart question at the end of an interview? Business Insider lists 29 brilliants ones you can actually pick from;
- Forbes Woman gives us a few precious tips on getting more African-American women into STEM;
- Ever had to deliver bad news at work? Ellevate Network provides you with 5 tips to ease the blow (and be more effective in the process);
- Are you a professional woman suffering from insomnia? Corporette tips you off on some great health habits to adopt now;
- If you’ve ever suffered professional discrimination as a woman, you must read this Washington Post report of a woman on a flight saying the flight attendant didn’t believe she was a doctor;
- Have you been recently promoted but you’re still unhappy? Ellevate Network suggest 7 important questions to ask yourself;
- Refinery 29 tips us off on the drugstore makeup the pros love…all under $15 (oh, and here are The Corporate Sister-approved top picks as well);
- Last but not least, I’m so excited to be featured once more on Ellevate Network and the Huffington Post! Read more on how to stop taking things personally at work.
Happy Friday,
The Corporate Sis.
by Solange Lopes | Oct 13, 2016 | Career, Working Mom & Woman Tips
Work, work, work! Sometimes all there seems to be for working women is a whole lot of work. Work at work, work at home, work in our relationships, work in our businesses! And while a lot of credit should go to all these working women warriors who get so much done in so little time, there’s something to say about working smarter instead of working harder. That’s where technology, and more specifically, apps come in. Because you know, if it exists, there’s got to be an app for it…
I have to say, as moderately technology-savvy (which is an improvement in my book) as I am, I love my apps. Especially when they can help make work, life and everything around, easier to manage, track and enjoy too…
And since I’m always on the lookout for new apps to take something or another off my plate, here are 7 of my latest favorite, mom-approved, working-woman-vouched, apps to add the “easy” factor to work, life and everything in between:
This one app is a staple in my list of absolute must-have apps. If you like lists, and remembering things, and storing articles, this app will be your go-to. This is where you can save quick notes, images, audios, and sync them across all your devices at once. You can also make use of references, and its strong search feature, which allows you to retrieve information you need in record time! It’s perfect if you run a business on the side or full-time, or if you just like to keep your information in one safe place right at your fingertips.
ShopSavvy
You know the feeling of buying an item full price from store A, and seeing it in store B at…half the price (after the return period at Store A of course). Well, this app will save you some of that price comparison struggle, by allowing you to track sales at your favorite stores. Its uniques barcode feature will also let you scan whatever item you want to buy, and find out if you can snag it somewhere else at a bargain! And voila….
So you and BFF went for tapas, and now she kinda owes you 30 bucks, but asking for it would be kinda awkward…Well, now you can split the check, and avoid all the confusion (especially if the tapas were accompanied by some pretty colorful margaritas) with this app.
I have to say, after becoming a mama, my good ol’ times of grabbing a book and lounging on the couch are far and few in between. If you don’t have as much time to browse through your literature favorites, but still want to enjoy a book or two on the go, Audible is for you! You can listen while driving, running errands or cleaning the house (now who says you can’t do chores and get smarter at the same time?)….
Listen, you gotta keep your mind on your money, and your money on your mind! That’s where Mint comes in, for busy working women who still want to keep track of their money! You can use it to organize your finances, pull your bank accounts, credit card bills, expenses and investments, all onto one easy to navigate platform.
This female-focused app offers more than 100 workouts designed by Nike master trainers themselves. And if like me, you’re ready to use any excuse not to work out, this app is for you! All you need is your smartphone, sneakers and a picture of that dress you’ve been saving since last year….
I’m not a big fan of unclean public bathrooms (who is?), and unfortunately, after babies, your bladder isn’t as tolerant as it used to be. Hence the need to find suitable bathrooms in unfamiliar areas! Which is exactly where this funny, but oh so useful app, comes in! SitorSquat not only shows you bathrooms in the area, but also rates them by order of ahem…cleanliness!
What other apps have made your life easier?
Love,
The Corporate Sis.
by Solange Lopes | Oct 12, 2016 | Working Mom & Woman Tips
It’s 7:30pm, and I’m half-lying on my daughter’s’ desk, as the hubby’s tirelessly explaining to her the concept of breaking 38 into various sets of tens and single digits. Didn’t get it? No worries, it took me a while too…If you’re a working parent (and yes, from the cubicle to the kitchen, we all are), you may be shaking your head as you read this…
Let’s be real…As much as we’re invested in our kids’ schooling, there’s that moment between the time you get home and realize dinner’s not ready (or existing for that matter), and when you’re faced with your kids’ mountain of homework. And it’s not like you remember fourth grade arithmetics, or can keep from yawning long enough to even read the topic at hand…And you know you’d rather get a root canal than admit that you have no clue what the heck their homework’s about….
I would know…As the Zero Patience Queen, some of my biggest parenting lessons have jumped at me, held me by the neck and slapped me around right around homework time. From admitting that I don’t know everything (yes, I have), to refraining from begging my baby to please understand additions before I have to pull my ‘fro off, the (homework) struggle is real. Thank God for the hubby and the power of prayer, or my edges would be resting peacefully in the Working Mom Hair’s cemetery…
There’s been quite a bit of a debate over whether parents should help kids with homework, and I do agree that parents shouldn’t do the work for their kids, or preventing them from achieving their learning milestones on their own. However, I still believe being available as a support and resource (without doing the work for them) counts mentally, emotionally and spiritually for both parents and children.
After countless evenings spent trying to remember old math concepts, and practicing silent inner meditation, here are some of the most precious lessons I’ve learnt from long homework sessions right after long days at work, applied arithmetics, and lots of love in between:
It’s Bonding Time.
If you’re a working mom (or dad) who’s ever felt those pangs of guilt when leaving your child at daycare or school to head to work, then homework time may be a great opportunity to bond while supporting your child.
I learnt at my own expense that, when it comes to homework time, it’s not just another task to cross off the family’s to-do list. It’s a good opportunity to check in on your child’s progress while still giving them enough space to do their own work (and enjoy their accomplishments). It can be as simple as being available to answer questions, or point your child to the right resources or thinking process.
Make it a collaborative process.
I remember the transition from having my babies “graduate” from daycare to preschool, and then to “real school, with actual homework, lunch bags to unpack, and a whole set of other logistical expectations to meet. And I remember the first days of coming home from work after 8+ hours at work, and answering my baby’s homework questions as I tried to hurry and empty my bladder in our now public home bathroom (yes, it gets that deep)….
Truth is, when it comes to adjusting and developing good school habits, including homework completion, it’s a learning process for both parents and children. Of course, we make it look like we’ve got it all handled, but I’d bet you even Olivia Pope would have some adjusting to do here…
After both Dear Daughter and I suffered from not being adjusted well enough to our daily routines, it took some discipline and both of us setting up a “homework ritual” to get us through the initial hurdles. Together, we’ve implemented our “3-Step system”, whereby she completes and reviews her homework (that’s Step 1), gets to ask any questions she has to help her through it (Step 2), before I or dear hubby take a look and point her to anything she may have to correct (Step 3).
Patience is a muscle.
Last but not least, the most important lesson the whole “homework” process has taught me over time is that patience, especially when it comes to parenting, is a muscle. Which also means you must exercise it, develop it, or watch it shrink in frustration as you desperately try to remember some random Pythagorean muscle…
And I’m so happy to report that our homework sessions have gone from tense and chocolate-filled, to fun and empowering times for both of us, Pythagorean concepts and all…
How do you handle the kids’ homework as a working parent?
Love,
The Corporate Sis.
by Solange Lopes | Oct 11, 2016 | Career
Wear to Work: Ribbed Turtleneck – Photo credit: Shopstyle.com
Our Wear to Work feature presents a selected piece of professional attire and other alternatives and complements for women at work.
Ok, I have a thing for turtlenecks…I cannot wait for the Fall to start sporting my favorite pieces. There’s just something about the sleek, classic, and impossibly chic look of a turtleneck (not to mention that you don’t have to freeze to death for style’s sake). Hence today’s WTW pick, this easy, simple but oh so distinctive merino ribbed turtleneck sweater from Uniqlo.
Love, love, love the elegant, slightly shiny texture of this super comfortable sweater that you can literally pair with anything. The slender cut is extremely flattering, hugging you in all the right places (and leaving the wrong ones alone). It’s a great option for that in-between season when Fall’s settling in, but is also perfect for the cold weather. And it’s $29.90 at Uniqlo to boot!
I also love the fact that it’s available in beige, black, blue, brown, dark grey, mustard, navy, off-white, olive, red and wine. As far as I’m concerned, I’d get all of them!
Other alternatives include this Splendid charcoal number from Nordstrom, or this Vince cropped cashmere version from Neiman Marcus.
Plus-sizes.
In plus-sizes, I’m frankly smitten with this Ralph Lauren slim fitting piece from Macy’s, great as an everyday essential or layering piece for the winter. I also like this Land’s End classic and inexpensive, but very chic turtleneck.
But all bets are off with this Neiman Marcus Cashmere Collection beauty in a selection of great colors, like aubergine, navy, sand and white.
Petites.
In petites, this Style & Co number from Macy’s is one of my favorites. Otherwise, I would get every single color of this perfect turtleneck from Talbots (it’s that good!).
So turtleneck or no turtleneck?
To Your Success,
The Corporate Sis.
