by Solange Lopes | Jan 30, 2015 | Career
Photo credit: vulture.com
Yes, Shondaland is officially back, as it made its TV return last night with a bang. And so did my Thursday night wine drinking, but that’s besides the point…If you’ve been living under a rock, and are not sure what the whole Shondaland fuss is about, read this, and this too…
Last night’s theme in Shondaland was “Woman Power is back”, really! Yesterday’s episode of Grey’s Anatomy had me cheering for Meredith, who finally made peace with Derek taking that great job in DC and vowing they “can do this”. Now she’s stuck with two kids, her own demanding job, and having to look for a “person” to get and help her. Woman, thou art strong! April keeps herself together after the devastating news of her baby’s potentially fatal birth defect, while Arizona tries to save her mentor’s life by offering a risky yet potentially life-saving surgery. Strong women!
Now after all last season’s Scandal, Olivia Pope comes back as a kidnapping victim caught in a web of lies and deceipt, somewhere far far away. No damsel in distress here though, Miss Pope is ready to find a way out of hell, even if that means ripping the wire out of her lace bra or pulling the trigger for real this time (no Poppa Pope funny business here, there were bullets in the gun this time around). Yet as she’s thinking she finally escaped, she’s still captive. And at the risk of sounding vain, it felt good to note even Olivia Pope’s hair does frizz up, even if only under extreme circumstances. Just sayin’…
Last but not least, How to Get Away with Murder, which went from one murder to two (Lila and Sam), had me wondering what women like Annalise are made of. It’s fiction, I get it, but what does it take for a woman to catch her husband cheating, find out he got the girl pregnant, be the lawyer on the girl’s death case (in which her husband is bound to be involved), find him dead later, presumably killed by her own students, and then go back to court to defend all this mess and save her own wig! Now if that’s not strength, I don’t know what is…
Shondaland gave me a serious helping of strong women last night, along with my glass of Sauvignon blanc…I’m glad Woman Power is back in town…
The Corporate Sis.
by Solange Lopes | Jan 29, 2015 | Career |
Overwhelmed at work – Photo credit: http://i.huffpost.com
It’s January, and for most of us at work, it’s just crazy! Year-end deadlines, 10K filings, audit committees, yearly reports, everything is due yesterday. Work is coming at you from every corner, management is running around like a chicken without head (or much of anything else), the vending machines are back in business (hello failed New Year resolutions), and the mood is kicking (literally). If you’re overwhelmed at work, and chances are you may be more than a few times a year, do you speak up and say so, or ask for help (or more chocolate)? Or do you just keep your head down and plow through mountains of work without a word, for the sake of a paycheck?
Being overwhelmed at work has become commonplace. While there are tons of tips and tricks, from time management to living in the moment, to deal with the barrage of to-do’s our jobs have become, one thing many of us fail to do in those instances is simply to speak up! I’ve found myself in many instances when I was downright miserable, with too much on my plate, smiling and faking the funk, acting like I “got this”. Truth is, all I had was a great chance at providing sub-par work in a sub-par state of mind at a sub-par time, which turned out to be exactly what happened.
My $0.05: Speak up! At the risk of sounding like a normal human being (sorry, Superwoman-wannabe), say it like it is. It’s not an admission of guilt, rather it’s a courageous self-assessment. You’re not helping anyone trying to kill yourself, and producing sucky work as a result. Ask if some of your work can be re-distributed, or if the deadline can be pushed to allow for it to be done well. Always emphasize the importance of work quality over quantity! You, and your entire management team, will be glad when the report comes out stellar (and you come out sane!).
Do you speak up when overwhelmed at work?
The Corporate Sis.
by Solange Lopes | Jan 29, 2015 | Career
Floral baggy trousers – $29.99 – Photo: mango.com
I don’t feature trousers often, because honestly, I tend to get bored with them. Ok, I may be a bit on the overly stylish side, but don’t blame me if I like to have fun with my fashion, even at work. Hence today’s fun Work It pick, these floral baggy trousers from Mango. Mango is having a great sale right now, and these fun, yet still professional looking pants, are discounted down to $29.99!
As scary as the term “floral baggy trousers” may sound, I’m loving these flowy and original pants. The pattern fast-forwards us to Spring (or Hawaii, whatever floats your boat), while still remaining pretty muted. The bow and pleats at the waist are flattering to most shapes (and lunch sizes), while the side pockets and decorative twin welt pockets make it a safe bet for work. Love, love, love! Very easy to style as well, just throw on a basic color sweater or blouse, and voila…
The Corporate Sis.
by Solange Lopes | Jan 29, 2015 | Career |
Potty Training – Photo credit: http://2.bp.blogspot.com
We’re currently in the throes of potty training our last one. If you’ve ever tried potty training a two-year old who has no idea why you’d want them to sit on an open bowl, or separate from anything coming from their own bodies, including their own feces, you know this is closer to boot camp than tea time. A great manager of mine, who at the time was also going through the fun of potty training, wisely said to me: “It’s like good management, you’ve got to learn to get the worst out of people before you can get the best.” Back then, it made me smile, this past week-end, it made me seriously question my management skills as I insistently interrogated my toddler “Baby, is this poop or chocolate?”
The average age for potty training around the world is 23 months, allegedly (not in my household, but anyhow…). Most children will be fully trained within three to six months, and 98% of kids are potty trained by age 3. Despite such statistics, the long-lasting psychological effects of potty training, mostly know through Freud’s theories, can last a lifetime, and can be especially challenging for complex or special-needs personalities. This is all to say it just doesn’t happen overnight, and requires some attention, discipline, and careful handling of individual personalities. Just like good management…
- Good management requires knowing who you’re working with: Listen, not every kid is the same, and not every employee is the same. I was dealt some beautifully challenging little people, who have to know the why’s and how’s of potty training inside out. Why do I have to poop in the toilet? What’s that (must we answer)? Why YOU don’t sit on the potty? The same goes for each and everyone of us at work. Some of us want to understand the why of everything, others could care less, others want to know the most efficient (and faster) way to do things, other will ponder on details all day every day. Bottom line: we’re all different, to get the best out of people, you’ve got to know who they are and how they work best. Period.
- It’s about helping others succeed: That means understanding what’s standing in their way, and helping them remove their own roadblocks. What it does NOT mean is imposing roadblocks, and ensuing punishment, on individuals who are simply trying to do their best. In psychoanalytical terms, Freud would have called this “anal retentive” behavior, in reference to a child being punished during potty training, in turn becoming stubborn and overly orderly. It’s about helping here, not hindering.
- Leading by example is key: I had to sit on the toilet next to my little one for hours on end to show my support to the process. Half of it was bonding time, the other half had my bum painfully asleep. Yet it was necessary. Managers who lead from afar are ineffective and intimidating. The real winners are those who get in the trenches with their teams, get dirty and help get the job done. Period.
- Good managers are ok with being vulnerable: We’ve been taught in order to make it, especially in the harsh, “beat or get beaten” corporate world, we must be tough. Especially when it comes to women at work, showing vulnerability is a big no-no. You can’t get mad at work, you definitely can’t cry at work, lest your whole career is drowned in a stream of sorry tears. In other words, keep your emotions shoved inside, plaster a big smile on your face, and get to work! Right? Wrong…Good managers, actually great managers, use their emotions as a competitive advantage for their team, and are willing to open up and be seen. In the book “Daring Greatly“, Dr. Brene Brown confirms “there can be no innovation without vulnerability”. No wonder we’re sorely lacking in better businesses…
- Last but not least, sharing is caring! Part of our potty training ritual at home consists in showing we care, and sharing what we’ve learned and what we’ve really sucked at. That is, the good, the bad, the ugly, and a good lollipop to reward good effort. Good managers share information, instead of hoarding it for fear of letting go of their competitive advantage (which it never was meant to be). Passing on knowledge and best practices is the foundation of leadership.
Maybe we should all return to the basics. Now back to my interrogation session: “Baby, tell mommy, is it poop or chocolate? (oh, it better be chocolate)…
by Solange Lopes | Jan 28, 2015 | Career
Conduct a passive job search – Photo credit: thenewblackchick.com
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The Corporate Sis.
