by Solange Lopes | Jan 7, 2015 | Career |
Photo credit: guidedoc.com
I discussed earlier dating for the successful professional woman. Yet for those of us who’ve been off the dating scene for some time, we tend to be more worried about the balance between work and marriage.
At a time when work is taking more and more space in our lives, tracing clear boundaries between career and marriage is increasingly challenging. Between increasing work demands, a still frail economy, unsatisfying careers, just to mention a few, our most intimate relationships are harshly put to the test.
Toxic work environments, lack of career success, grueling schedules, just to cite a few, all contribute to the demise of many marriages. How do we then, as responsible, ambitious, professionals, keep work from getting in the way of our relationships?
1. Recognize there’s a problem! If you haven’t had a real conversation with your partner for way too long because they’re always working, or if work is making either of you so miserable you can’t stand each other, recognize the issue! Acknowledge there’s a problem, and if you want to save the relationship, it’s time to face it…
2. Talk, talk, and talk some more! Don’t keep your feelings bottled up. Neither of you has to give up on their dreams or hopes to survive. The point of a relationship is to help each other! Discuss your issues at or with your current work, and be honest about what you feel!
3. Pick your battles! Work is challenging. Issues will come up at you every which way, and some days will make you want to eat chocolate for the rest of your life. Yet, in order to balance the rest of your life and your career, pick your battles! Distinguish between what is worth complaining about to your partner and what is just the stuff of everyday. While you may need to address serious work-related issues, you don’t want to over-burden your relationship.
4.Make a plan, and follow through! If either of your careers is threatening your relationship, make a plan. Is it time to quit and survive on one salary? Or is another job a necessity? Can you afford to jump ship and start your own business? Make a plan, and stick to it, together!
How do you deal with work getting in the way of your relationship?
The Corporate Sis.
by Solange Lopes | Jan 6, 2015 | Career |
Photo credit: http://interracialmarriageandfamily.com
Loss happens. It’s part of life, just as crisis, births, big and small events. And while our worlds stop for a bit as we pick ourselves back up after the loss of a loved one, it seems work continues. In office environments where politics are the new normal and personal advancement tends to matter more than cooperation these days, how should one react to a co-worker in grief? Do we drop our guard and freely empathize with them? Or do we keep everything “professionally correct”? Do we cut them some slack, or act as if business is going on “as usual”?
My $0.05: Frankly, all this “political correctedness” stuff at work has made us forget we are human after all. Show compassion and empathy, offer a sympathy card signed by everyone, go out of your way to show you care, that’s just what people do. Also acknowledge this person may not be in their best state of mind, so if you can offer to alleviate their workload, do so. After all, a caring workplace is a better workplace!
How do you react towards a grieving co-worker?
The Corporate Sis.
by Solange Lopes | Jan 6, 2015 | Career |
Salvatore Ferragamo Ninna – $575 – Photo: zappos.com
I’m more of a stiletto woman, yet I’ve caught myself on many occasions, especially at work, being partial to chunky heels. It’s the endless dilemma between comfortable and cute shoes at work, except chunky heels are not just comfortable, they’re also upgrading from your grandma’s closet to the quite “cute” side of fashion. Hence today’s Work It post dedicated to chunky heels (and finally being able to combine height and comfort, painlessly that is…)
- Low chunky heels: For the more conservative woman (who’s also not too concerned about height), there are some pretty classic, can’t-go-wrong choices like this Salvatore Ferragamo pair from Zappos. On the more frugal spectrum of things, this nude patent Enzo Angiolini pair is also a safe bet. These Breckelle booties from Polyvore are also pretty fashionable, without sacrificing practicality (and safety for some of us)…
- Chunky mid-heels: I like these JODI Toe cap mid-heels from Topshop for their contemporary originality and versatility. In the boots department, these Lily boots from Nordstrom Rack are a fashionable steal, while this Ninna pair from Zappos is all you need for the Boardroom (plus or minus a few things)…
As for high heels, I tend to reserve them for personal time rather than the office (check out my corporate heels-tiquette post).
Are you into chunky heels for the office? Any suggestions? Please chime in…
The Corporate Sis.
by Solange Lopes | Jan 6, 2015 | Career |
Dating – Photo: huffingtonpost.com
Dating as a successful professional woman can be challenging. And when I say challenging, I mean, CHALLENGING! Between just having the time to date (not to mention prep time, finances and sheer willingness to interact with the other sex), and surmounting all the stereotypes and pre-conceived ideas about professional, ambitious women in their 30’s, anyone would be tempted to crawl on their couch with a good book or a glass of Pinot instead of hitting the dating scene on a Saturday night.
Let’s be honest. Dating is hard work. It’s like investing in volatile funds, or eating fat-free dessert, you put in the work, use up your make-up and heels, with no guarantee of any return. Plus you have to tread carefully, not to sound like you’re out-earning, out-manning or flat out emasculating your partner…And this is all after putting in a full day’s work, and then some…
1. Stop apologizing for your success! No need to work so hard at being liked or appreciated. You want a partner, not an approval stamp! While you may not need to brag, downplaying your achievements is also a no-go. Just be you!
2. Set the record straight! As a career woman, it’s tempting to paint a more or less traditional image of ourselves when dating. If your career is important to you, say so! If you are in a demanding field of work, set the record straight as well. If on the other hand, you are ready to kiss the corporate world good-bye, don’t mislead your date!
3. Use your power! Many a professionally successful and powerful women can close multi-million dolllar deals at work, yet cannot muster the courage to ask a date out. Use your power (in a good way) to attract the love you deserve!
4. Make room for love! Choices matter, and ours sometimes matter a lot more than we’d admit. More travel or less travel? More work or less work? Exclude or include certain types of partners? Make room in your life and work for potential partners, it may make the process less dreadful, and even a bit spicier…
5. Last but not least, don’t settle! As challenging as the dating scene may be for successful professional women, settling for less never made anyone happy. If your gut is warning you this person may not be for you, you may just have to listen!
Any dating tips you have for professional successful women?
The Corporate Sis.
by Solange Lopes | Jan 5, 2015 | Career |
What are your career goals – Photo: huffingtonpost.com
‘Tis the New Year, and while I don’t necessarily believe in the whole New Year’s resolutions thing for your career, I do think most of us could benefit from better habits when it comes to work. As yearly reviews are underway, and career goals are being thought about, set and un-set, what are your career goals for this year? Where do you see yourself in the next 12 months? Are you planning to go for the next promotion, volunteer for the next high-profile project, or just coast and see where all the professional hoopla takes you? Or are you growing restless of the corporate world, and itching to set up your own entrepreneurial venture? What’s it going to be?
[polldaddy poll=8562128]
The Corporate Sis.
