by Solange Lopes | Dec 6, 2013 | Career |
Photo: anntaylor.com
Holiday parties at work are fast approaching! And with them, the question of what to wear…It has to be work-appropriate, but still festive enough. For my own holiday party
needs, I tend to favor elegant dresses accessorized just right, topped with a dressy yet understated blazer or just worn alone.
This holiday season, my pick is a ponte 3/4 sleeve flounce dress straight from Ann Taylor, with figure flattering details and a conservative, yet flirty, look. To top it off, it’s now marked down to 50% off from its original $139 price, quite a deal…
by Solange Lopes | Dec 4, 2013 | Career
Photo: dreamstime.com
You are a conscientious, dedicated professional. And you especially pride yourself in the quality of your work and your impeccable professionalism. Or you may just be a corporate rookie, starting out in this professional jungle, and learning the ropes as you go.
Whether you’re among the most seasoned corporate veterans out there or just starting out as a newbie, this probably already happened to you…And by this, I mean the “Oops” moment when you realized you forgot to update that file, or you didn’t think this email through and pressed the “Send” button too fast…There, you messed up, and you messed up real bad…So bad you’re wondering if you should just crawl under your desk and start calling your girlfriends for moral support, or a recruiter’s name for that matter…Before all hell breaks loose and you get ready to jump ship, please reconsider:
Own up to your mistake!Nothing worse than messing up, and denying the facts. It makes you look bad, and definitely taints your professionalism and reputation. If you did it, own up to it, apologize, and take responsibility. It’s not the end of the world, it’s an opportunity to fix a problem…
Offer up a solution.Ok, it was a mistake, and you wish it had never happened. Now it’s time for damage control. Whip out your creative wits, and propose a fix to the problem. And do it sooner than later, as you don’t want the issue to linger long enough for everyone to remember it…
Don’t forget to follow up!So you owned up to your professional booboo and offered an effective fix. Now the key is to make sure that the solution gets implemented and the problem effectively remediated. You wouldn’t want it to bite you in the bum-bum just as you gear up for that promotion, right?
Last but not least, don’t dwell on it! Don’t allow a mistake to impede your progress. In the words of a big corporate sis of mine, “Dust your shoulders off and move on!”
How are you managing mistakes at work?
The Corporate Sister.
by Solange Lopes | Dec 4, 2013 | Career |
Photo: dreamstime.com
“Can you go get that file?” “Do you mind getting the coffee?” “Could you make these copies?” Many of us corporate sisters, if not most of us, have been in these uncomfortable at best, unnerving at most, situations when as the only woman in the room, or one of the only women in the room, we were made to wear the “secretary hat”. You know, when you get that sense that you are expected to be more of a nurturer than an actual equal collaborator…
Women have long been put in the caretaker category, and it’s no surprise that in a male-dominated workplace, the perceptions and stereotypes are no different. And for double minorities such as Black women professionals (shouldn’t that even be considered a triple minority), the stereotype is all the more potent as it actually gets acted upon.
All of a sudden, here you are standing at the copy machine making copies for everyone else as the meeting is in session. Or lugging heavy binders back and forth to accommodate everyone else. As much as we must all be of service in our individual capacities at work and everywhere else, some boundaries still have to be established between what can be considered “service” and what actually goes beyond it…
In order to set a different path for ourselves and trump the stereotypes and negative perceptions associated with sisters in the corporate world, we must first have the courage to take our secretary’s hats off! We need to be able to step out of the caregiver and nurturer mentality to take our place at the meeting table. And we must learn to recognize the dangerous signs alerting us that we are not being allowed to fulfill our professional duties.
So how do we react to this? Do we just say no? Do we resort to anger and carry around hurt feelings? Do we repress these very same feelings and opt out of the conversation altogether?
Many are the alternatives, few are the effective ones…What remains at the end of the day is that there is always a possibility to stand up for oneself in all situations, with professionalism and grace.
Whether it’s through the use of humor, or by gently suggesting that another team member helps carry out the impromptu assigned “secretarial” duty, or even by bringing the matter up to Human Resources if the noted pattern worsens over time, there are ways to bring much-needed attention to this problem. And by doing so, to teach others the boundaries between the acceptable and…well, the lines that should not be crossed…
Leadership is about being able to wear very many different hats, but it’s also about having the courage to take off those hats that do not fit us…And this may just be one…
The Corporate Sister.
by Solange Lopes | Dec 4, 2013 | Career |
Photo: urbanbellemag.com
For many, a healthy marriage and a successful career may not sound like they could go hand in hand. After all, how does one reconcile the sometimes strenuous demands of a corporate career without endangering the fragile equilibrium of matrimony and family? How can we muster enough dedication and commitment to keep pushing forward in our careers while still achieving the proverbial work-life balance? And last but not least, how do you manage to find the TIME to do both, all the while trying to put in extra hours and plan the occasional date with the hubby?
So it may seem strange to argue that actually working on your marriage may just give an added boost to your career. Yet it is very much true…Most married corporate sisters I’ve talked to over the years have admitted that as hard as it is to juggle career and family, the added stability of a healthy marriage has allowed them to be more effective at work. Besides, knowing that in the midst of their struggles and victories in the corporate jungle, they can always count on a supportive partner to lift them up in times of need,or just listen to them griping about that horrible boss, makes a world of difference.
In my own experience, I’ve found that a marriage, just like a career, takes work, dedication, commitment, and TIME…And it is necessary to allocate to it the right amount of effort and yes, TIME, in order for it to be a solid foundation for the rest of our lives, including our careers, for many different reasons:
Your partner is your partner, even after you’re done burning the midnight oil on that year-end project…And when you get home in need of much rest, guess who might just be there to give you a foot rub…Yup, not that year-end project…
Your biological clock is still ticking, despite all the embryo freezing technology and arguments about women’s fertility. It’s just nature’s course, and if it having babies is part of your life plan, a good marriage may just help…
You need the support system! As “independent woman” as we may all want to believe we are, it doesn’t hurt to use some support every now and then, or every day…Besides, having another pair of hands to pick up the groceries, shuttle the kids to soccer practice or just remember to turn the heat off, may just allow you to finish that report and submit it on time…
It’s better to take risks when you have a partner to fall back on than when you don’t…Successful careers take more than work and dedication, they also require a certain amount of gut and risk. And when you can jump off some bridge with someone by your side holding your hand, you should definitely work on not letting that hand go….
At the end of the day, being in a healthy marriage will make you happier than having a good job. It’s not just what a large body of research has found, it’s just what my grandmother will tell you after 60 years of marriage and a brilliant career…
Last but not least, divorce is way too expensive! As challenging as marriage coupled with a career can be at times, it may just not be worth starting over financially, professionally and emotionally again. Work on what you have, and it may just be what you need after all…
Do you think working on your marriage will boost your career?
The Corporate Sister.
by Solange Lopes | Nov 21, 2013 | Career
Many are the career sins that we all commit on an almost daily basis. From overt arrogance to destructive ruthlessness, to excessive pride and lashed out anger on the job, there are definitely more than 7 career sins out there…
Yet for corporate sisters, and all women in general thriving in the corporate jungle, there is THIS one sin that we seem to repeatedly commit.
You can catch us committing this sin in meetings, when we unconsciously deny ourselves the right to contribute otherwise innovative ideas. Or as we’re presented with new projects and endeavors that could make us noticed throughout the company, and we just remain quiet. Better yet, many of us are caught red-handed and guilty, as we share our brilliant ideas with others and allow them to take credit for our work.
It’s the sin of SILENCE, and it may just be our biggest corporate downfall…
Are you guilty?
The Corporate Sister.
