In one week, Kathleen’s professional world had totally changed. Her beloved manager whom she has worked with for decades was leaving, two of her team members were switching teams, and she was now left with a list of unanswered questions in her career. She had to deal with change at work…
As for Sarah, she had just received news of an amazing offer in the context of her side business, and was ready to transition full-time into entrepreneurship. All the while, Mary was getting ready to go on maternity leave, and had decided she would not come back after a couple of months, but instead take an extended leave of absence to stay with her baby at home.
These are just a few of the scenarios of change affecting so many women, and men, at work. In every career, business or professional endeavor really, if there’s one constant, it’s change. And now more than ever, we’re no longer apologizing for job-hopping, especially among millenials, as our priorities have shifted from being slaves to the cubicle, to looking for what really fulfills us as people. Which has translated in even more career transitions, changes and upheavals over time.
My own career has changed quite a bit from the days I started in Big Corporate, all fresh and new in my preppy Ann Taylor suit, not giving a thought to how things would pan out later. As a bit of creature of comfort, dealing with all the changes that naturally came, from changing jobs, to moving cities, to having children, took a toll I didn’t expect at first. I mean, it’s not like anyone pulls you in a corner on your first day and tells you: “Look, it looks great and all, you’ll be getting a paycheck, but in a few months/years/decades, things will change dramatically and it might seriously suck!”
The point is, we’re hardly ever ready for the changes, big or small, that come into our careers and/or businesses. Whether it’s the layoff, or the team change, or the sudden increase in hours and workload, it almost always seems to drop on you like a ten-pound weight. Even a promotion, or a great opportunity, is a change in itself, and can bring about effects we still have to manage.
So how do you prepare for change in your work or business, especially when it’s not easy or straightforward to plan for it? Do you just go with the flow, and roll with the punches as you go, and expect everything to fall into place? Or drown yourself in a tub of sea salt caramel Haagen Dazs ice cream when all hell seems to break loose?
Or do you take change as an opportunity to push yourself forward?
While you can’t always control the types, timing and impact of the changes that are bound to hit your career sooner or later, you can control what you do with it over time. You may have to pick up your face off the floor first, sit yourself down somewhere and have one more scoop of ice cream though…
Change almost always reveals something you need to learn.
You can bet on it. If there’s a skill you need to acquire, or something you need in your career or life arsenal, it’ll probably come to you in the form of a change request initially. Like when your boss suddenly leaves, and you need to learn to be more self-reliant and transition to a new style of management when someone else replaces them.
Or when you make a career transition of some kind, whether you decide it’s time to jump ship and become a full-time entrepreneur, opt for a job rotation, or decide to become a stay-at-home mom, and have to learn to adapt to a totally different life and career context.
A great mentor of mine once had this insightful tip:
“Whenever change happens, in your life or career, ask yourself: What am I supposed to learn here?” And go do your homework…
Tip: Take an inventory of the most critical changes that have affected your career in the past year or so. What did you need to learn? What have you learnt from these?
Change forces us to come up with solutions.
That’s the thing when situations get upside down, and shifts happen, in your career or life. You not only have to learn from them, and adjust somehow, but you also have to come us with practical solutions and actions.
I had to radically change my approach to my schedule when I needed to take and pass my CPA exam. After many (and I humbly mean, many) attempts at passing the certification, my back was against the wall, and something had to change, or else my career and life would suffer (in addition to my ballooning weight and that stress acne too). So I had to get the big guns action plans out, as in devise a realistic but effective schedule, and incremental steps to get me to cross that hurdle.
Tip: Consider the changes that you have or need to make in your career and life right now. Have you devised action plans to help you manage those changes? What steps do you have to take to do so?
Change helps you manage beat your fears.
You know how you get ready for work in the am, and start getting afraid of being late for the 9am team meeting…only to get on the highway and see all your fears materialize: it’s bumper-to-bumper traffic, and yes, you’ve effectively missed the 9am team meeting. And did we mention you were supposed to lead it?
I don’t know about you, but every time change is needed or happens in my career or life, it almost always brings to light a series of fears I had previously carefully packed away in the back of my mind.
It could be that a new manager is coming in to your team, and it brings out all your fears and insecurities about receiving feedback and being evaluated on new criteria. Or that you’ve been promoted to a new position, and you’re scared that you’ll mess up on the very first day.
And no, it’s not bad karma, or your first cousin’s old promise that you’ll be punished for flushing all their Halloween candy (stuff happens, ok). It’s a way of forcing you to face the very stuff you think you can’t face, and instead of going around it, actually do what it takes to beat it.
If it’s a fear of speaking up, and you’ve just been promoted to a position that requires you to let your voice be heard, you can practice by joining an organization like Toastmasters, or even forcing yourself to express your opinions more frequently.
Tip: Look at the last change that has happened at work for you. Did it bring out a fear/insecurity in you? Which one? What action can you take to squash that fear?
In Conclusion:
Identify the changes that have happened to you most recently at work or in life. Write them down somewhere and keep an inventory.
For each significant change, pinpoint at least one lesson it has taught you.
Identify at least three actions you have implemented, or will implement, to face each change.
Do a self-analysis and identify at least one fear or insecurity these changes have made you feel, and how you can manage to beat it.
Vision board = Powerful visualization tool used to help clarify, concentrate and maintain focus on your life goals.
Last week-end, I set out to do do something I had planned on doing a couple of years ago, but was kinda resisting all along…So after a couple of years of fighting with myself and procrastinating, I walked into Staples on a rainy Sunday morning, grabbed a cork board (HERE’s a medium-sized one, and a wide frame one HEREfrom Staples), a box of colorful pushpins (check out this one HERE), some scissors (like this pretty pink one HERE), and went on my way with a mission: Build my first vision board ever!
I got home and gathered a bunch of magazines and even some of my favorite books, and went to town. There I was cutting, sticking, and creating the best visual representation I could muster of who I was and what I really wanted out of life! And between the board, the scissors, the colorful pushpins and the images I picked, it was both scary and exhilarating at the same time…
Now why a vision board? And how can a simple piece of corkboard with some random images stuck to it create the life of your dreams? How about working on what you really want and already have, and leave all the woo woo stuff to your superstitious grandma?
Those are all questions that kept me from buying into the whole concept of visualization and creating a vision board. For the longest time, I have to admit I thought vision boards were kind of an active exercise in daydreaming. Well, I’m glad to report the joke was on me…And here’s why…
Visualization is your brain’s most powerful tool.
According to Psychology Today, a weightlifter lifting hundreds of pounds emits the same vibration patterns as when s/he simply imagines it. Or you could just ask olympians for the basis of their mental training, and they’ll gladly tell you that visualizing their performance ahead of time helps them not only do better, but actually even work the same muscles they would otherwise use in reality.
This is to say that for decades, and especially in popular culture after the book The Secret came out, we’ve been realizing that our brains are more powerful than we think. That we can actually change our performances, outcomes of situations and our entire lives based on the thoughts we think and those things we can see in the eye of your mind. I mean, if uccessful moguls like Oprah Winfrey and Uncle Rush consistently use vision boards in their own lives and empires, why shouldn’t we?
BUT (there’s always a but, right…)
We tend to resist seeing ourselves as our best selves.
From my own experience, I can see how it’s easier to just conform, and resolve ourselves to”fit in” to our environments, rather than daring to see ourselves in the full expression of our potential and desires.
Whether it’s in our careers, our businesses, even in our families and relationships, it requires a lot of courage to say “this is what I want, and that’s what I’m going for.” Is it any surprise then that women especially tend to not negotiate the salaries they want and deserve? That we tend to put ourselves last? And that we’d rather be “realistic” than give our dreams a real shot?
Yet again, is a simple piece of corkboard with a bunch of ideal images stuck to it with colorful pushpins going to be able to change all of that, and all of a sudden give us that promotion, send us on that vacation, or build that billion-dollar empire for us?
Which brings me to my next point…
The secret is not in the stuff, it’s in what the stuff brings out of you!
The biggest misconception I had about vision boards was that they were about the stuff. The perfect job, the dream house, the vacation in Venice, even hanging out with Oprah (Oprah, if you ever read this, I’ve not given up, and yes, you’re on my vision board)…Except I was totally wrong…
As we strive in life and allow ourselves to aspire for more, ask for more, experience more, we’re not just yearning for the stuff. Sure, the stuff is part of it. That amazing business would allow you to afford that Cartier watch you’ve been eyeing. Making partners at the firm would let you have more of the prestige and everything that goes with it, including the padded yacht and luxurious vacations…
But what really makes a difference, what really drives us, moves us, makes us get up in the morning, is not the stuff. It’s how the stuff makes us feel. How watching our kids grow into amazing people in part because we can afford to give them a quality education, makes us feel. Or how building a business from scratch turns us from fearful creatures into fearless, powerful individuals.
That’s the secret wrapped into visualizing simple images from a magazine into a reality you can live. And that’s also the fuel hidden inside the power of those visualizations, that turn the power of your mind into tangible action that brings you closer and closer every single day to your wildest, craziest goals…
Just because you dared to question your own assumptions, stepped into a Staples on a random Sunday morning, and purchased a corkboard, a few pushpins, and a solid pair of pink scissors…
So if you’re ready to give it a try, here are a few things you’ll need:
Any kind of board. It can be a corkboard, like the ones I recommend above from Staples.
Magazines you’d like to cut inspiring images from, like that great beach in Rio de Janeiro you’ll be lounging in soon, or that Louboutin beauty you’ll be slipping your tired feet in in no time
Your favorite photos, quotes, sayings…All the stuff that inspires you to keep going. For me, it includes my kids’ and hubby pics, my mom, dad and siblings, and all the empowering Bible quotes and other mantras I live by. And don’t forget to add a picture of yourself in there as well, preferably one taken at a time when you were really happy, to bring back those memories.
Embellishments: if you’re into the glitz and glam of board vision making, then knock yourself out. Add fun stickers, markers and all the bling you want to make your board really YOU.
Last but not least, give yourself some time and space! Allow a couple of hours for this exercise, so you’re not rushing into it, and you really take your time to pick the images that best represent your best self and life. Most importantly, take the time to enjoy the process and enjoy yourself through it!
Pick a space that evokes peace and harmony to you. If you’re in the mood, light a candle, put on some soft music, or that Beyonce anthem that gets you going…And while you’re at it, pour yourself a glass of wine too…
PS: Here’s a quick tutorial on how to build your dream vision board that I really like from The Cubicle Chick:
Let me preface this by saying that I’m a woman of my makeup (and my shoes and my purses too, don’t judge). Not that I would roll into work looking like I’m ready for the Paris Fashion Week, but you know, looking fresh and on par can help with the whole getting through the day thing…
And it’s another reason why I love the Fall, as with the new season comes a little upgrade in our makeup routine for work. Everything about Fall is a bit more refined, a tad more sophisticated, and that goes for our makeup as professional and business women as well…
For me, it’s a matter of reconciling my crazy morning life routine with the glam mom buried deep inside of me (most days). Which means picking on-point, beautiful but efficient products that take minimal time to apply and have maximum impact…so when you catch me strutting my stuff running around, at least I’ll look and feel like I kinda woke up like this…
So here are my mom-approved,”I-only-got-5-minutes-to-get-ready”, “make-me-over-now” 7 top work makeup picks fora subtle but right on par Fall makeup for work:
NARS All Day Luminous Weightless Foundation – Photo credit: shopstyle.com
This all-day, natural-looking coverage foundation has quickly become one of my favorites. All you need literally is one drop, and you’re good to go! It builds and blends effortlessly, and reduces discoloration over time too! And I love the fact that it’s available in a range of great shades for women of color as well. It’s $48 at Nordstrom.
Laura Mercier High Coverage Concealer – Photo credit: shopstyle.com
You know when the kids have been waking up about every hour on the hour, and you get up looking like a raccoon gifted you with extra eyes…You get the drift. I’m always on the lookout for great concealer (blame the kids and the blog) that makes me look like I just had a full 8 hours of restful sleep (appearance matters, people). And this Laura Mercier high coverage concealer has been doing the trick for me lately. The high coverage formula is highly pigmented, and blends and build flawlessly for a great yet still natural-looking effect. Read: I get to work looking like I won’t have to drink about 5 cups of coffee to get by! It’s $30 at Nordstrom.
MAC Mineralize Skinfinish – Photo credit: shopstyle.com
I love this luxurious yet natural powder. No chance to look like you fell into the flour jar, or are celebrating Halloween year-long here! Plus it has minerals in it, and provides a matte finish that’s almost perfect under most lights (including the horrible lighting in your office’s conference rooms). It’s $33 at Nordstrom.
Maybelline The Nudes Eyewear Palette – Photo credit: shopstyle.com
Pulling a natural-looking but put-together look for work is easy with this selection of nude eyeshadows. The shades are subtle but still add a little something’ something’, even if only to make you look like you’re not daydreaming about your bed during the quarterly earnings presentation. Just sayin’…It’s $9.99 at Ulta.
Now I don’t know why it took so long for someone to invent this thing, but it’s definitely been worth the wait…If you have to pick between looking like a powdered cake, or sporting a smooth, radiant skin that glistens from a distance, please get yourself a beauty blender. I love that it allows me to apply minimal foundation and concealer, and still look flawless in the end (I mean, of course I’m biased). It’s $20 at Neiman Marcus.
Bare Minerals Ready Blush – Photo credit: Shopstyle.com
Fall is my season to “blush” it! There’s something about the chill in the air that makes you want to get a little cheeky (no pun intended, people). One of my favorites is the Bare Minerals Ready Blush, which has great colors for all skin tones and is neutral enough to sport to the office. It’s $24 at Macy’s.
Now don’t get me wrong, I have a bit of a lipstick/lipgloss/lip balm obsession, and will grab every mildly attractive lipstick I see in a drugstore just because. But if I have to invest in a long-lasting, Fall-ready lipstick, it would be this plum beauty from MAC! It’s $17 at Nordstrom.
What are your favorite work makeup picks for Fall?
Big changes at work? The Glassdoor Blog gives you tips on how to handle them;
Ever cried at work? One of America’s favorite CEOs tells you why it’s OK;
Want to become your own boss, but not sure where to start? Black Enterprise tips you off on 5 part-time franchise opportunities for your side hustle;
Did you regret accepting the offer after day 1 on the job? According to Ellevate Network, you should have asked these three questions beforehand;
This University of South Carolina Assistant Professor created an app that helps you rate your media for equity, inclusion and general content quality;
Wondering what recruiters look for in new candidates? Ellevate points out these three things;
The Paris Fashion Week is in full swing, and the Business of Fashion confirms that it’s all about women empowerment;
Soup season has officially started, people. Love and Lemons shares with us their 10 favorite soup recipes to whip up throughout the Fall.
PS: Did I miss anything? Email me at corporate@thecorporatesister.com with any career, lifestyle or inspiration news you’d like me to share, or simply post a comment below!
Our “Wear to Work” feature presents a piece of professional attire recommended for corporate and business sisters.
So one of the trends this Fall is velvet. I have to say, I had to refrain from picturing my beloved grandmother donning her favorite ankle-length velvet skirt at first. But the rebel fashionista in me decided to do a double-take into the velvet world, and what I found wasn’t too shabby either…
Today’s “Wear to Work” pick and splurge of the week is this Joie velvet blazer from Neiman Marcus. I’ve seen other velvet blazers around, but what really made me stop at this one is the impeccable fit and cut. It’s easy to look frumpy when you’re wearing velvet if the cut is not right on point…
This elegant blazer nips at the waist in a flattering way, and boasts a distinctive rounded notch lapel and classic single-button cuffs on each sleeve . It’s clean and classic with an edge, and at $428, it’s well worth the splurge for a staple you can take from work to wine any day. It’s currently available at Neiman Marcus in sizes 00 through 12.
Plus sizes.
In plus sizes, I’ve found this Esley Fine and Sandy velvet number in a red/maroon at ModCloth, for a very reasonable $79.99. If you’re ready to splurge, this Joan Vass two-button blazer from Neiman Marcus is as pretty as the penny it costs (no pun intended, people).
Petites.
I love this preppy navy version in petite sizes from Petite 00 to 12, available at Banana Republic. Throw it on a pair of slacks for a relaxed day at the office, or with your favorite pair of jeans on the week-end, and you’ll be velvet-perfect (I couldn’t resist..)…
I was listening to a sermon by one of my absolute favorite pastors in the world, Pastor T.D. Jakes, and this phrase he used single-handedly changed my perspective on the whole concept of opposition, especially at work.
How many times do we feel “stuck” because someone, whether it’s the boss, the boss’ boss, or even a colleague, is a source of opposition for us? How many times do we feel unmotivated, defeated, and unsure of ourselves, because someone or even a set of seemingly unfortunate circumstances, puts a wall smack down in the middle of our career path?
The boss just decides they no longer like us, and starts taking away opportunities and promotions from us.
A colleague decides they have to undermine you in order for him/her to advance at your expense.
All hell’s breaking loose at home, and you can’t concentrate to get the job done at work.
It could be anything really. Or maybe you’re just not as passionate about what you’re doing, and every slight mistake you’re making is being pinned to you to bring you down.
We all face opposition at work from time to time. For some of us, it may be a daily thing. You may be walking in the office with your armor on every day, ready to go for battle on that quarterly report, or that year-end project. And many a times, it can wreak havoc on our personal lives, seeping into our relationships and family life.
What do you do when opposition strikes at work, and you still have to make a paycheck and show up every day? Do you just lift your hands to the sky, pack up and give up? Do you stay and blindly strike back, at the expense of ruining your health and relationships in and outside of work?
When I heard Pastor T.D. Jakes talk about turning opposition into opportunity, it took me back to all those times at work, when I personally either left because I thought I couldn’t deal. Or stayed and waged a blind fight against anything and everything, failing to recognize the real problem or solve it for that matter.
Yet, if we take a moment to stop and think about what this opposition really means in our careers, and actually devise ways to leverage it instead of falling prey to it, we may just turn the whole thing to our advantage. Opposition is neither bad nor good, it’s like change, it just is and opportunity to look around and at what you’re doing, and re-position yourself in a better way:
Opposition is a sign that you may be doing something right.
Yes, even when it seems all your boss can see are your mistakes. Or the office gossip has you looking like the department’s villain. Because work is a lot like life, in that if you’re not doing anything barely noticeable, you’re not very likely to be noticed, or opposed for that matter.
So instead of taking the opposition as a sign that your career has come to a screeching halt, or that you’re doing something terribly bad, take it as a sign that you may be doing something right. That in the middle of the muddy waters of work, there may actually be gems you can use to propel yourself forward.
Opposition points you to something you must learn.
Every time I’ve faced opposition, I’ve had something to learn. In every seed of opposition, there’s a nugget of wisdom to be extracted, squeezed and actually turned into your competitive advantage.
What type of criticism are you facing? Is your performance being blamed? Play the detective, and gather all the arguments making up your opposition, and sit down with the whole thing for a while. What can you learn from it? What’s the hidden message behind it?
Even better, go straight to your opposition, and ask what they think you can do better. It may be going to the boss who constantly belittles you, and ask them for constructive feedback. Or the colleague who spreads rumors about you, and seek their opinion.
In all cases, there’s always something you must learn for yourself. For me, it meant developing my own perseverance and self-confidence in the faith of obstacles. What is it for you?
Opposition is a fuel to Excellence.
There’s no better time to go for the gold then when you have a wall of opposition stand before you. It may seem counter-intuitive, but using the fuel of frustration and dissatisfaction created by the feeling of constantly being opposed, can actually work wonders in your performance.
Every time you face opposition, turn the resulting lack of motivation and defeated attitude into fuel. Fuel to do more, to do better, to close up every gap in your performance and attitude that could be shot at.
And whatever you do, take a few minutes to wallow into your temporary frustration, buy the shoes, and keep going…
Our “Wear toWork” feature presents a piece of workwear, along with great alternatives, for stylish corporate sisters.
Who doesn’t love a great sheath dress you can recycle from the office to the dinner table? And when it’s as stylish and affordable as this Merona bi-stretch twill sheath dress from none other than…Target, it can’t get any better! I love the versatility of this dress: you can rock it all day from meeting to meeting, with a nice cardigan like this J. Crew original leopard wool style.This dress is $29.99 at Target!
In petite sizes, this Pendleton petite sheath dress from 6pm is the perfect LBD you can pretty much take everywhere and anywhere. Or you could opt for this sophisticated Tahari bi-stretch sheath dress from Nordstrom, featuring an inverted notch collar and some serious architectural details.
Plus-sizes.
In plus sizes, I love this Ellen Tracy tweed print sheath dress from Nordstrom for its vibrant print and rich texture, perfect for the Fall. This Adriana Papell side rushed crepe number is both flattering and elegant, as is this preppy square neck ponte sheath version from Talbots. My favorite? This Fall-ready Signature 3/4 sleeve textured color block dress from JC Penney.
In one week, Kathleen’s professional world had totally changed. Her beloved manager whom she has worked with for decades was leaving, two of her team members were switching teams, and she was now left with a list of unanswered questions in her career. She had to deal with change at work…
Vision board = Powerful visualization tool used to help clarify, concentrate and maintain focus on your life goals. 
Let me preface this by saying that I’m a woman of my makeup (and my shoes and my purses too, don’t judge). Not that I would roll into work looking like I’m ready for the 
This is our weekly career and lifestyle news update, where we round up exciting news of the last week and we let you have it…ahem, news-wise that is…
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